Stay active, curious and committed

Some time later I kept getting symptoms in my neck and head area during weight training. My head automatically moved up a little. I went to see a neurologist. The doctor calmed me down and diagnosed me with dystonia (editorial note: a movement disorder with muscle cramps and spasms). I was then also given treatment.

But the problems with my head got worse over time. I went to see various doctors, from orthopedic specialists to neurosurgeons. They tried out all sorts of things but nothing helped. Nobody suspected it might be Parkinson's.

An acquaintance then sent me to an orthopedic surgeon who examined me very thoroughly and referred me to a neurologist for further clarification. I didn't like the neurologist, but he was very good. He said straight away that he was going to examine me for Parkinson's. I couldn't understand that at all. I was convinced that I didn't have anything like that, and was skeptical. I let him do the examination, though, and the next day he called me and asked me to come in and see him. I guessed then that I had Parkinson's. I was at my wit's end.

I then went to see him with my wife. But I was surprised, both by the doctor and by myself: It was Parkinson's, but he was truly happy about the news! He said that it was good to finally know what was wrong. Because now I could get the right treatment. That gave me hope. I finally knew what the matter was and that things could be done to treat it.

The doctor started treatment with a very low dose of medication. But even on such a low dose I couldn't sleep. At first I thought that it might not have anything to do with the medication at all, but as the dose increased, as planned, my trouble sleeping got worse. It got better when I was prescribed sleeping tablets. But then I started feeling anxious. I asked the doctor to change something.

He changed the medication. The new medication was much better at first. Over time I became forgetful and had trouble concentrating, though. And I started feeling down. That was a really bad time for me. We then agreed I should stop taking the medication and at first I had no medication at all until I was sent to an in-patient rehabilitation center. The rehabilitation really helped me. I was given a new type of medication. I still tolerate it very well and I don't have any side effects. I'm also prescribed an antidepressant in a very low dose. It has all worked out very well.

Over time I’ve learned to live with the illness. It wasn't always easy and it took a while. At times it's still difficult. But in a way I suppose I can count myself lucky.

Not long after my diagnosis I saw a documentary on TV about a husband and wife who both had Parkinson's. It showed how the couple managed their daily lives with the disease. That dispelled a lot of my worries.

I then got in touch with a support group and went to a bar to meet with the group for the first time. I still go now. Talking to other people who are in a similar situation helps me, it gives me strength and courage.

Thanks to that documentary about the couple and the contacts in the support group, I've seen that it's possible to live a fulfilling life with Parkinson's. That was a relief to me and made me feel more optimistic.

In all these years my doctors have of course helped me, but my family and my employer have been especially supportive. After the diagnosis it was very important for me to know that people close to me were still by my side. That nobody wanted to leave me and that I could keep my job. That gave me a sense of security. And that security formed the basis of adjusting to a life with Parkinson's.

My employer organized for us to meet with the works council, the head of department and the HR department and discuss together how I could best be helped. We decided to follow the "Hamburg Model" for returning to work. Once my sick leave was up, I gradually started going back, at first for up to four hours a day, and then I continued to work on a part-time basis. They took care to make sure my workspace was right, like making sure my office wasn't too far from the toilets because I have difficulty walking. What I particularly appreciate is that my abilities and interests are taken into account when work is being delegated.

Work is an important part of my life. I would never have considered stopping work because of the illness. Quite the opposite actually; I'm much more committed than I used to be. And I really enjoy work. We're all the same when we're at our desks. We all do the same job and I enjoy that. And only working half days is liberating because it matches up with the amount of work I can actually do and keeps me from getting worn out.

I try to be as open as possible about my illness, even though that's still not always easy. At work, for example, I spoke about it a few weeks after the diagnosis. The illness has changed me overall. I'm more open than I used to be.

I think it's important to still enjoy life and remain curious. Also to dare to do new things, try something out that you've always wanted to do, and not hide away. To make a commitment to others, to a hobby, to work – and to stay active. That also takes your mind off the illness!

I want to keep mentally fit. I do a lot of things on the internet. And I also make films. I basically enjoy trying out new things.

Contact with other patients through the support group is very important to me. Speaking to others who have the same problem puts my situation into perspective. I'm now good friends with people from the group. I'm happy if I get an unexpected call from "fellow sufferers" who just want to know how I'm doing. I (and the others) usually feel a little better after having a quick chat.

If I'm alone and feeling down, I sometimes also write short stories. It helps, it distracts me and I usually feel better afterwards. Going to stay at a monastery also helps me. I don't do anything there, I'm just there. I sleep, eat, talk to the people and meditate, which also gives me strength.

Parkinson's is a very unpleasant disease with lots of symptoms. Dealing with the physical and mental symptoms is a new challenge every day. Accepting those challenges can make life richer and more intense. But you have to have a good medication treatment plan (which becomes more important as the illness progresses) and an understanding, but also demanding social network. Carpe Diem!